logo Cuckoo' s Nest
Cuckoo' s Nest
gay cruise bar
mon-thu 13:00–01:00, fri-sat 13:00–02:00, sun 13:00–01:00
47 reviews
Rated 2.7/5 based on 65 user reviews
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Show large mapCuckoo' s Nest
Nieuwezijds Kolk 6
1012 PV  Amsterdam, Netherlands

Hotel for Cuckoo' s Nest

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What is it?

Cuckoo' s Nest is a small gay bar... with a huge play area in the basement. There is a labyrinth with different types of cabins. The water sports area is not hard to find: just follow your nose...

Action in the Cuckoo's Nest starts right from the early afternoon, and gets quite busy after work (17:00). This place is also popular early in the evenings as the cruise bars in the Warmoesstraat do not get busy before midnight.

Condoms are available from the bar or the dispensers. Don't forget to order a drink first before you go downstairs.

Leave any valuables at the coat check, dark places always attract pick pockets.

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Features

coat check, darkroom, private cabines, cruising area, glory holes, golden shower area

Website

www.cuckoosnest.nl

Website

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When is it?

mon-thu 13:00–01:00, fri-sat 13:00–02:00, sun 13:00–01:00

Favorite of 19 Nightdudes

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Anonymous 19 days ago   

Denk dat dit DE plek is waar ik me vreselijk kan later onder smeren. Ik bedoel op me knieën in een hoekje. Naakt. En geblinddoekt. Kom allemaal maar met je sap naar me toe. En smeer het in me gezicht en over mijn lijf. Ben daar 28 of 29 november rond 19.00

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22 days ago   

Old men.

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2 months ago   

Two or three years ago, this was a great place for a beer and a quick fuck. It seems those days are gone: it's always quiet here, even on Saturday night. No tourists, no cute locals -- just an atmosphere of quiet boozy despair and lots of elderly men.

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2 months ago   

Wilco, I agree with you that Johnny is being rude, but he is 100% correct.

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3 months ago

To Johnny, I too am in my 40's but respect all who want to enjoy this bar. I wonder how you will react in a few years time when you are classed as old. You'll probably stay home and masterbate. Hopefully you will as you're certainly not welcome in our city!

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3 months ago   

Nothing but old guys here. I am in my early forties and don't pretend to be any younger, but this was like visiting a psychiatric/geriatric ward.

GAY TOURISTS, PLEASE STAY AWAY FROM AMSTERDAM. IT IS DEAD. THERE IS NOTHING HERE. ONLY OLD FAGGOTS REMAIN. IT IS WORSE THAN HELL HERE. ONLY OLD MEN. ONLY OLD ONES. OLD. OLD. STAY HOME AND MASTURBATE. ONLY OLD GUYS HERE!!! OLD! OLD! OLD!!! THERE ARE NO YOUNG GUYS HERE! THEY ARE OLD, O SO VERY OLD!!!!!!!!!!!!

OLD GUYS!!!!!!! AAAAARGHH!

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4 months ago   

Only good if you're into old and/or mentally ill men. Quiet, smelly and scary.

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8 months ago   

Amazing place! No silly young people here to ruin the atmosphere with their glowing skin and supple limbs, just a bunch of badly-dressed fifty-to-seventy-somethings drinking the winters of their lives away. Gay Amsterdam at its finest.

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9 months ago   

On a typical Friday or Saturday night you will find two things here: 1) a small crowd of scary, minging queers aged 50-70, and 2) an atmosphere of despair. In other words, it's just like the rest of Amsterdam.

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10 months ago

Denk dat dit DE plek is waar ik me vreselijk kan later onder smeren. Ik bedoel op me knieën in een hoekje. Naakt. En geblinddoekt. Kom allemaal maar met je sap naar me toe. En smeer het in me gezicht en over mijn lijf. Ben daar 4 feb rond 15.00

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10 months ago   

I'm in my late 20s, and I visited this club in multiple occasions and I must say, actually I like this place. Central, cheap beer, staff is ok, plenty of space, they even recharge the battery of your phone if the battery is dead (very sweet). True, there are old guys as it is true for all the cruising place in the known universe (and personally I'm not into them, just a matter of personal preference) but you can also find young guys. Clearly is not a disco, where the average of the crowd's age is 20, but I never left disappointed. You will always find some young guys to have fun with there if you are young cute, so in that case give it a try.

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11 months ago   

Mostly mouldy oldies here. Like being in a horror movie full of zombies, only with much worse music (no Goblin here, just a bunch of wrinkled gremlins). Whatever appeal Amsterdam may have held for cruisy gay men once, it's dead and buried now.

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over a year ago   

I fucked a hot guy in his tight ass with my hard cock here yesterday. Made me laugh all the more at the many old men pointlessly going around in circles in the basement, super-anxious to get their leg over and never succeeding. Hilarious.

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over a year ago   

This used to be a great place to get some action, but for the past eighteen months or so the (sparse) crowd here has largely consisted of old and creepy men. The same goes for all the other cruising venues in this boring, phoney tourist trap of a town full of ancient mingers. RIP Amsterdam.

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over a year ago

Was here briefly around 1:30 a.m. on a Friday night. There was practically nobody there. Amsterdam is a city without nightlife.

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over a year ago   

Full of OAPs (Old-Ass Phaggots).

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over a year ago   

If this place had a Western theme it would be called "The Old, the Fat and the Ugly". I guess Grindr has killed the cruising scene for good, and only human flotsam (like me) still frequents places like this.

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over a year ago   

Too many old guys.

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over a year ago   

I love this bar! As a youthful man in his early seventies I find this the perfect place to go cruising for young guys in their fifties and sixties. Juicy!!!

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over a year ago   

I visited the Cuckoo's Nest, Dirty Dicks and Eagle last Saturday (i.e. Pink Saturday as well as the Pride opening night) and was somewhat surprised to find that these places were no less quiet than usual.

In fact, when visiting Dirty Dicks at 11 pm I found all of three people there, one of whom was a youngish tourist, who left in a hurry when he saw what was (not) on offer. Management had thoughtfully removed the bar stools to make more room, but that turned out not to be necessary at all.

Later, a few people turned up, but they were all in their sixties at least.

Let's face it: the Amsterdam Pride has become a party for babymakers, who get to congratulate themselves on how tolerant they are. It's about "culture", "tolerance", "acceptance" and a whole slew of admirable ideals, but I was left wondering what happened to the gay stuff.

Did anybody manage to get laid in Amsterdam last weekend?

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